10. Three words: no fresh mackerel.
9. There's no jobs "out there", neither.
8. Folks looks at ya right funny when ya puts ketchup on your scrambled eggs, fried baloney or mashed potatoes. THEY thinks it's normal to put ketchup on Kraft Dinner!
7. They talks right queer, "out there", they do.
6. They EAT mussels. You can't gets them restaurants to serve a whole lobster for love nor money. Not one of those friggin' places serves fried baloney. A body could starve to death.
5. Some provincial governments are right tight with their welfare money. Some even makes ya WORK for it.
4. They think Joe Bat's Arm is a joke name -- an' there's no convincin' them otherwise, me son.
3. They thinks Maritimers are all bakers, 'cause they keeps sayin' we're "in bread".
2. When you go home to visit, you'll have out-of-province licence plates an' folks'll think that you're just another friggin' tourist.
1. You may just land your ownself a job "out there" an' you may be makin' more money than you are now, but that won't matter. 'Cause you'll spend the difference payin' for your long distance phone bill, seein' as you'll soon come to the conclusion that the other nine reasons in this list are true an' you're right homesick and miserable since you moved away, an' you calls your folks every second day.
STAY HOME B'YS. It's too late for me, save your ownselves.
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